Accountability is vital when considering forgiveness, both for the person offering it and the one receiving it. Here’s why accountability is essential:
- Owning Up To It: Accountability means taking responsibility for our actions. Taking responsibility can help build trust and facilitate emotional healing for the offender and victim. It also acknowledges that the harm committed was wrong, that the offender understands the impact of that harm, and that the offender is committed to making amends.
- Not Repeating Harm: Accountability requires recognizing mistakes and harm and avoiding repeating them. A genuine commitment to change, making forgiveness more likely and effective, will help prevent further harm.
- Affirming the Victim: Accountability takes seriously the harm committed and affirms that the feelings and experiences of the one harmed are valid. This shows respect and consideration.
- Getting Clarity: Accountability helps clarify what went wrong and why. Clarity can give closure and make moving forward easier for both parties.
A plea for forgiveness without accountability cheapens the process and neglects to be honest about the harm committed. If we want to be communities of love, respect, and honor, we must do the work of accountability. We must face up to what we’ve done, acknowledge the pain we’ve caused, and commit to making restitution.